40 days....

Today is the first day of the rest of your life.

I've heard that statement from the time I was child. Never quite understanding what it really meant. What I think it means is that today--or tomorrow, you can start over. The past is back there and today is a new day. Another chance to be the person you want to be.

Today happens to be the first day of Lent, a good day to begin anew. The day after gorging yourself with pancakes and packzkis, liquor and parties on Bourbon street. Today is the day that many Catholics and Christians alike give something up for 40 days in honor of Jesus and his 40 days in desert.

Even though I'm not Catholic--I did go to Catholic school so Lent was something I've always been really aware of. Whether I took part in it was a whole different matter. However, I do remember my grandma gave up her after dinner cigarette for Lent and never smoked again. Others give up candy, pie or sweets altogether. Fast food, wine, chips, sex, you name it.

I'm not sure if there are specific rules you have to follow but from my understanding the purpose of Lent is the preparation of the believer—through prayer, penitence, almsgiving and self-denial—for Easter or the celebration of Death and Resurrection of Jesus Christ.

For me, this year will be the first year as an adult that I will participate in the celebration of Lent. I've come to a point where I want things to be different. I want my mind to be clearer and I want my body to be cleaner. I want more self-control and self-direction. I need to be whomever it is I think I should have been by now.

This is an excerpt from the AmericanCatholic.org website:

Fasting is more than a means of developing self-control. It is often an aid to prayer, as the pangs of hunger remind us of our hunger for God. The first reading on the Friday after Ash Wednesday points out another important dimension of fasting.

The prophet Isaiah insists that fasting without changing our behavior is not pleasing to God.

"This, rather, is the fasting that I wish: releasing those bound unjustly, untying the thongs of the yoke; setting free the oppressed, breaking every yoke; sharing your bread with the hungry, sheltering the oppressed and the homeless; clothing the naked when you see them, and not turning your back on your own" (Is 58:6-7).

Fasting should be linked to our concern for those who are forced to fast by their poverty, those who suffer from the injustices of our economic and political structures, those who are in need for any reason. Thus fasting, too, is linked to living out our baptismal promises. By our Baptism, we are charged with the responsibility of showing Christ's love to the world, especially to those in need. Fasting can help us realize the suffering that so many people in our world experience every day, and it should lead us to greater efforts to alleviate that suffering.

Abstaining from meat traditionally also linked us to the poor, who could seldom afford meat for their meals. It can do the same today if we remember the purpose of abstinence and embrace it as a spiritual link to those whose diets are sparse and simple. That should be the goal we set for ourselves—a sparse and simple meal. Avoiding meat while eating lobster misses the whole point!

Even if you aren't particularly religious, I think that you can appreciate what it means to give something up in order to better understand what you have. Being able to really empathize with someone who has something you take for granted everyday could do wonders for your point of view.

Sitting quietly with yourself--some call it prayer can do wonders for your mind and your soul. Bring out a sense of creativity and inspiration that has been repressed by the business of everyday life.

So I have chosen to give up meat for 40 days, that's a big deal for this carnivore. I've also decided to focus more and give up my friend procrastination. Because as it states above, fasting without changing our behavior is pointless. I don't think I can give up meat forever, but I can give up my unhealthy sense of laziness and lack of motivation. I have so many resources available to me and I think 40 days should be enough time to put them to good use.

What are your thoughts?

Do you celebrate Lent, what will you give up?

The Gambler

I just finished watching the Oscars and I must say I'm glad I didn't put any money on it because I would have lost big time. Big Time!

I really thought The Curious Case... was going to win best picture and Brad Pitt would win best actor. Wrong and wrong. I haven't seen 'Slumdog Millionaire' but I understand that it was the underdog and everyone loves an underdog.... Plus, Bollywood is really on the come-up now so I'm sure we will be seeing more India based movies in the near future. Of course I love seeing more brown people getting proper screen time.

As far as best actress goes I really thought Angie had it in the bag. I'm glad Kate won though, because she is so sweet and seems like a genuine person. I loved how she waved to her Dad in the audience, so cute.

Taraji P. Henson had the best supporting actress vote from me but Penelope Cruz took that one home for that threesome Barcelona movie.

I will say, I knew Heath Ledger would win best supporting actor for 'The Dark Knight' but really, who didn't?

I thought Frost/Nixon would get some awards but I don't think they got any.

I haven't seen 'The Wrestler" but Mickey Rourke had my vote from the previews. No one could play such a rundown, downtrodden, lost and washed-up, has-been better then him. I say that with the best intentions!

All in all I really, really enjoyed the show. Will Smith looked great. The dance number with Hugh Jackman and Beyonce was fantabulous, as was the opening number.

I think the inventive way they did the presentations of the best actress/actor, best supporting actor/actress was a delightful change that I wish they would have thought of long ago. It was nice to see winners from the past honoring all the nominees of the evening. In past years it has always seemed to me as though they didn't pay much attention to all the nominees. It really is a big deal just to get to that point, whether they win or lose.

As far as fashion goes:

Ann Hathaway and Taraji P. Henson had the best dresses of all.

What are your thoughts?

Picture credit: Getty

Are you there God, it's me, Erika

I swear I'm not dead, even though I feel like it most days....

I've put aside once again one of the most important things to me, my writing.

I have ideas, thoughts, ramblings all sorts of things I could say but some how my motivation has left. I jot down notes and ideas all over the place but they never get any further then my handy dandy notebook. I hate that I'm one of those people who needs accolades and a support system to keep going but I do. My lack support from family makes it really hard to believe in myself.

I am way to old for that.

I suck.

So here it is a new year and not much to show for it. Well I have to get off my duff or actually get on my duff and write something, something brilliant. A friend reminded me that I have been writing this book forever in my head but haven't got much down on paper. I need to go back to basics and remember what it is I've always wanted.

I have a dream.

Yes Virginia, it does snow in Vegas.

A street scene a few miles from my house....

A picture of the desert covered in snow....

To the surprise of some it snowed here yesterday. Click here for the breaking news story.

I, on the other hand wasn't surprised. I knew that every so often it does snow in the desert. I was just hoping--praying even that it wouldn't be for a few more years. I really do feel bad for the mid-west and east coast vacationers who came here for fun and sun....

Better luck next year!

Since this is my blog and all about me, I want to know...

Can I have one, just one entire winter without snow??? Is that to much to ask from this Detroit transplant!

Jeez.

Good thing I had just finished knitting these.

All The Rage

Some friends of mine are going to see the new vampire flick Twilight this weekend. However I'm torn on whether to tag along. Because--now brace yourself.......I haven't read the book. I may be the only woman under the age of 35 who hasn't.



To my defense, I don't really like Vampire books or movies in fact. So I've never had any interest in reading the YA fiction. However, after seeing an interview with Stephenie Meyers, the author of the teenaged-blood thirsty-love story trilogy I did think twice about my vampire story apprehensions. Her story has a Cinderella-esque ring to it. You can read the interview here.



I don't know whether to love her or to hate her. I mean jeez, I know writers who have toiled for years and can't get an agent. She simply dreams up a story and wrote it down and VOILA! she's a NY Times best seller...? I know I know don't be a hater, Erika but the story, it's just almost to good to be true. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy for my fellow mother of three and full time writer for her immense success. I'm just showing my catty side I guess....



Nonetheless, my dilemma is whether I need to read the book(s) before I see the movie or vise versa. If I read the book first then I will undoubtedly expect more from the movie. Because in my opinion the movies rarely do the books justice. On the other hand, I can see the movie first and not have any great expectations and then read the book to fill in the blanks.



Which do you prefer?


Photo courtesy of CBS Sunday Morning

My Favorite Time of Year...

This is absolutely my favorite time of year. I LOVE Thanksgiving. It has to be the best holiday hands down. Maybe because I love cooking so much and I do SO MUCH of it on Thanksgiving. Here's a rundown on my 2008 Thanksgiving menu:

New York Style Prime Rib Roast

Dressing

Candied yams

Green Bean Casserole

Turnip & Mustard Greens

Mashed Potatoes??

Macaroni and Cheese

Dessert is the husbands department but I've put a bid in for sweet potato pie--my husbands sweet pie is the ish and zucchini bread...

This is the first year that I'm doing the roast so pray with me that I don't destroy a $90 piece of meat! I found some pretty good recipes at the grocery store and on allrecipes.com. Everything else is pretty much the same as every other year. Except for the mashed potatoes, I never make mashed potatoes on T-Day and it feels weird to even be thinking about it. Maybe because I don't know any black people who make them on Thanksgiving. I'm sure there are some, I just don't know them... However, since I'm making a roast it seems like mashed is called for don't you?

I don't know what it is about Thanksgiving that I love so much. I could say it's the crisp fall air and the beauty of the reds and golds that the leaves turn. Now, since I'm not in Michigan anymore and the weather is in the high 70's and there are very few trees to turn I know that's not it. Could it be the Thanksgiving day Lions football game? .....ummm no.

Maybe because it's a family holiday and you don't have to exchange presents. I hate the pressure and disappointment that those type of holidays can bring. Yup, I think that may just be it. That and all the food!

Photo courtesy of http://sharonscrapbook.blogspot.com. I hope mine turns out as well!

A New Day Has Come

So much to say.

So much hope and joy in my heart.

At this very moment I am proud to be an American.

I knew he was what we needed

I knew his audacity to hope was a wonder to us all.

I knew he had the determination, energy, strength, understanding and perseverance to do the job.

I wasn't sure it would happen....our dreams would come to fruition.

That America would have not only the audacity to hope but the courage to stand up and do it.

WE DID IT!

TOGETHER!

Congratulations America--to us all, for making the right decision, a decision that will benefit us all.

GO VOTE TODAY!!!!!!!!!

I had the chance to vote early but a lot of you haven't so I expect you to be out there today. No matter how long the line is or how cold or windy it may be. Do not drop the ball this time, we can't afford to lose, again....

A Picture Speaks a Thousand Words....

While You Are Out Here in Blogland...

Check out my review of the movie Fireproof here.

I have loads to talk about but not the good sense to write my ideas down and actually blog them. In my defense, I do have a good excuse....I just can't tell you about it :)

The Art of losing myself

I have talent. I can do things others can't. No I can't stand on my head or recite all the state capitals in alphabetical order--I can't do it in any order to be honest.



My talent is magnificent in itself and even though no one in their right mind would probably want it I would be happy to give it away.

Have you seen me?

Name-Erika Washington aka- Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!

DOB-1/6/1980

Height-5'4

Weight-129lbs

Eyes-Brown

Hair-Loreal #234 or 267

An extremely sexy writer with goals and ambitions to write novels and articles for major magazines and newspapers wearing really cute heels.

Last seen: Roaming Albertson's grocery store with food stuck to her dress, a migraine, a crying baby on one hip, a pouty 9 year old behind and a sassy 5 year old stuck on the other leg; unable to string a compound complex sentence together.

My thoughts...

• Grey's Anatomy and Brothers and Sisters both start this week, that makes me so happy!


• I apologize to my loyal 5 readers, I've been quite bitter these last few posts. Sorry.
  


• Warning, it my not be over just yet.


• My little fortune cookie from P.F. Chang's might have been right.


• Why isn't classmates.com out of business yet?The forecast says it's only going to be 91 next week, Fall must be here...lol


• Tuesday I had the most expensive burger I've ever eaten and it was worth it.


• My hand is itching.....


• Oktoberfest. Yum....


• I need a new phone. Tape is just not a good look.
  


• Thank you for being a friend.

Is It My Place?

There are few things in this world that I can boast about. I don't feel like I need to put on airs or display my feathers for all to see. Either you like me or you don't. Either way.....

What I can boast about is my JOB. Yes, my J-O-B. I work hard everyday and I am damn good at it. Every single day I wake up and my job starts instantly. From the moment I crawl out of bed and stumble into the kitchen to 3 am when someone wakes from a bad dream or wet sheets. It's hard, it's thankless and and it's mine. I love it with all my heart and know that this is what I was meant for. None of this is new and most Moms, especially the ones who do it solely without a side job as an attorney or doctor know that we are well underestimated.

Children take you for granted, husbands take you for granted and other women who have never raised a child think you just have it soooo easy. I get it. And unless you've been on this side you will never know. What amazes me are the women who have raised children. Those who had to struggle to get through each day when the baby that had a temp of 101 but they had to go to work anyway. The woman who did it without the help of a husband or grandmother. The same kind of woman who just simply wanted a break after 3 hours of a screaming newborn.

How can you look me straight in the eye and say that I need to get a real job?

What is it about my life that looks easy to you?

What part of raising productive citizens who make wise choices and succeed beyond any of our expectations isn't work?

A person who has never raised three children--three girls can't put themselves in my shoes. A person who was barely there for their own can't even look me in the face.

Everyone can't be me, so don't hate.

Who's Sleeping In Your Bed?

A marriage consists of two people. That's it. Unless your a member of the LDS church....

In a wedding ceremony two people vow to stay as one or so they say.

Those two people make love, make babies, make bills, make hate and make sacrifices for each other.

No one else should be involved. Especially not a parent. Certainly not a parent who has admitted that they were a shitty parent. If you had 18 years and 9 months to get it together but failed so many times on so many different levels. What on God's green earth gives you the right to run your mouth on someone who has put their children first since day one? None, absolutely none.

When you're on the outside looking in you only see a blurred vision of what is actually there. Only when you've opened the door, stepped inside and observed the entire house can you make careful observations.

The door is locked and you have not been invited in.

***pulls the curtain closed***

9-11-99

Today, my oldest turns 9.

Wow. I still can't believe it.

They weren't playing when they said Time Flies.....

The Girl Who Didn't Cry Uncle...

I think I've gone and bumped my head.

Most know, I am one of those people who bites off way more then can fit inside their mouths. Yet I still do it. Why? Good question, to bad I can't answer it. Maybe I have a fear of boredom.

Erica, I listened to your wisdom and has since dropped one of the classes....

But have replaced it with 3 new ideas for me to tackle.

I guess I'll never learn.

Lightning cuts the wild sky....Who are we?

As a mother of three I have witnessed my share of name-calling, bickering and immaturity. As a newbie into the culture of the “stay at home mommy club” I was, to say the least surprised that most of the culprits have been other mothers. Raising children is hard, that pretty much goes without saying, however, my personal feeling is that we make it so much harder then it has to be. We judge each other on how we feed, interact, teach and discipline them. Should I breast feed or use a bottle? When is the best time to start solid foods? Should I vaccinate my children? Is your way better then mine? These are all questions that run tirelessly through a new mothers head. There is so much information out there via television, news reports and parenting magazines telling us how to raise healthy, happy kids that it can feel somewhat overwhelming.

So you ask your fellow mommy at the park what type of parenting plan there on. This is where it can get ugly with the name calling and snarky remarks. One mother will believe that spanking is a necessary part of the discipline process and another will call it child abuse. Mommy number two will tell you the only way to give your kids proper nutrition is to breast feed until they’re five. While someone in the background will whisper how gross that is. Is spanking okay? Can I give my kid a bottle of Enfamil and know that she will be as smart as the rest of her class? Those questions can only be answered by the mother if at all. However, judging other mothers because they parent differently then you is not showing your own children how to treat a friend.

Believing that there is only one way to raise a child to become a productive citizen is a mistake. Maybe your way is better for you and my way is better for me and my children.
Everyone wants the best but the best isn’t being shown when we argue in front of our kids over who is better. We go out of our way to show our children how to share and use their manners but then turn around and become flippant with a mom who doesn’t see things our way. Support from our fellow mom is, in my biased opinion, the only way to raise children. As a community, mothers need to unite and educate each other so that all our children, whether cloth diapered or not can be the best they can be.

My Eyes were watching him

The first 2 minutes of this clip is the hottest love scene ever. That kiss...oh..my..God....help me jesus. Damn.

I think it's the way he looks at her, he never takes his eyes off her lips tounge mouth. She can't even close her eyes because she is so in love with this man and the way he touchs her.

You don't see black love scenes like this often so when one is made it should be shown over and over. Feel free to keep playing it...I know I have.

How Do You Want To Be Kissed?

If this isn't one of the sexiest love scenes ever, then I don't know what is...

The World's Only As Big As What You Know...

I seem to be on a roll with my random thoughts so I figure I'll just continue on. Some of these things are subjects I wanted to blog whole, long-winded posts about but just haven't had the time. I may go back and revisit later if I feel the need. In the meantime...

• In this state of reflection that I am currently in I have wondered how almost this entire year has gone by and I still feel like I have accomplished very little. I need to reassess my new years goals and get a serious fire lit under my ass.


• My dear friend Erica got bit by a Cobra! She is fine but dang a COBRA.


• Since I'm on the subject of Erica, I would like to point out that in all her pictures--and there must be hundreds from her nearly 2 year commitment to the Peace corps, I fail to see more then one black person. This of course is not including the villagers because yes, she is in Africa. However, in terms of volunteers I don't see any black American men or women there to Help, Educate, Learn from, Explore, Shape, Love or Give back to our "Motherland". What's up with that? Maybe they were all assigned to a different village or to China....nah, I don't think so.


• My new favorite morning treat: Nonni's caramel latte biscotti....the best part of waking up, besides coffee.


• Kwame, Kwame, Kwame, you have made a mockery of yourself, your children, your Mother and Detroit.


• It's official. My family has become a 2 grocery cart family. I knew it was coming but jeez, it still amazes me.


• Luke Skywalker from 2-Live-Crew.....you know--oh me so horny, me love you long time. Yeah that one, he has his own reality show on VH1 now. Apparently, he's playing a father knows best type while running an "Urban adult entertainment" business....I don't know either, I assume that's like umm ghetto porn? Who knows, but I bet you still got that song stuck in your head.


• My new favorite reality show is 'Wipeout" on ABC. I'm not sure why but I think it's the extremely humorous banter between the commentators more then anything else. It's definitely NOT the butt cam.


• I'm a huge 'Grey's Anatomy' fan, HUGE. I even bought a real set of the 1st season DVD's. Since everyone knows I only rent and burn, that's a big friggin' deal. Anyhoo, Kathrine Heigl's Emmy controversy is extremely irritating. I agree that last season was a bit bland but I blame that on the writers strike and Issah Washington's uncalled for departure. For her to say she doesn't want to be in the running for an Emmy because she wasn't given quality material is a crock of crap. She doesn't need an Emmy because she sucks. Her character sucks and her funny tooth sucks. Don't get me wrong, I don't think she's a bad actor--I liked "Knocked Up". But I almost didn't see it because of the snotty aire about her. I think that she's getting a little too big for her britches and needs to honor her contract and be grateful she has a job. We've seen it before, people get a few hit movies under there belt and demand to be let out of their contract and BAM! they fall flat on their face and can't get a job shakin' their ass let alone a major movie role. Heigl needs to realize she isn't Will Smith.


• I need a million dollars.


• I really, really want a fish pedicure.


• I swear my kids grow over night. One minute they look like babies the next like little people.


• Why do we constantly compare ourselves to other people? Always thinking we don't measure up...


• I'm really wondering how I teach my girls how to avoid the "magicians" in life. I know they will get their heart broken and it's necessary, but some of these men....they got the game on lock.


• Why is it so hard to get men to do things? Then, when you stop asking they want to know why you didn't ask them if they wanted to go...


• The Olympics start tonight! I got 17 days to finish the sweater and throw for the Ravelympics!


• "Nothing stands out so conspicuously, or so remains so firmly fixed in the memory, as something which you have blundered"--CICERO